Drabbles and Short Stories
by Shaetil
Summary: A collection of short writings to keep me going in between writing for my other stories. Rated 'M' for language.
1. Nurse Sanji

_I don't claim ownership of any creative property belonging to One Piece. This is just my hobby._

* * *

Sanji hummed to himself as he trotted down the halls with his special clipboard. He loved his job as a nurse. Caring for people when they were hurting made him happy. He loved the people he got to meet too. Usually everyone was friendly and interesting, but there was always at least one patient who made things difficult for the nursing staff. Sanji was one of the only male nurses at this hospital, so when the girls were having a hard time, they often asked him to help out.

Today the adorable nurse, Cami, had asked him to aid her with a real bastard that had been difficult about taking his medicines, eating, changing his bandages, taking his blood pressure... and just generally anything the nurses needed to do. Of course Sanji would never deny a beautiful woman a request - so even though he was giving up part of his break to fit in another patient, he would do it out of his eternal love for Cami. She would doubtlessly finally notice his shining feelings for her and fall into his arms! His heart beat faster just thinking about it! Ah, his pure love would be fullfilled at last!

Sanji stopped at room three hundred and thirty three, and double checked the chart. This was definitely the room. Now apparently this particular dumbass had gotten himself sliced head-to-toe falling off a mountain or something. Honestly, Sanji didn't care how the fucker had ended up at his hospital; this guy had upset Cami, so he would pay by having pills forcibly shoved down his throat!

Sanji strolled confidently into the room. "Mr. Roronoa? I understand you have some problems with your assigned nurse, so I dropped by to assist with making sure you receive the care recommended by your doctor." A loud snort of laughter made him look up from his clipboard with an irritated twitch to his brow, "What's so funny?"

"Oh my god, a _male_ nurse? And you're even wearing the same cute little hat the last bitch was wearing!"

Sanji growled and had a needle in his hand in a flash "Say that again and I'll pump you so full of morphine that you won't be able to tell if I've ripped your limbs off or not!"

The patient gave him an irritating smirk, "That's not much of a threat, nursie; taking all of my pain away? You'd be better off threatening me with this awful hospital food"

Sanji eyed the line of gauze taped all the way down the patient's tan chest. "So you _are_ in pain. Are you stupid? Refusing to take medicine that will help - dumb masochist."

The patient scowled and looked off to the side, giving Sanji a better look at a pierced ear and dyed green hair. Sanji smirked; was that supposed to be _style?_ "Are you just going to stand there like a creep all day, or are you going to get the picture and leave me the fuck alone? I'll heal just fine if I sleep."

Sanji rolled his eyes, "Sleeping is good for you, but you need other things to get you healthy as well." Smoothly, Sanji glided forward and trapped the patient's arm in a vice-like grip, slapping the pressure cuff on it before the shocked man came to and tried to wriggle away. "Good boy. Sit there like a nice plant, and let me do my job!"

"Fuck you, I'm not a plant!"

"Do you have a degree in medicine? No? Well I do, and I know a lump of fucking moss when I see it!"

Sanji took advantage of Zoro's next attempt at an argument to jam a thermometer in his ear. The way his eyes bugged out was hilarious. Sanji smirked victoriously as he went to the next chore that had to be completed.

"Oh HELL no!"

"Either you have me carry you to the bathroom or I get a catheter!" Sanji's flat tone and bland expression brooked no argument.

Zoro paled considerably. "F-fine."

Later Sanji left the hospital room with a little skip in his step. He had to find Cami and tell her what a good job he had done! It was funny though, he didn't think that patient was hard to deal with at all. Sanji had actually enjoyed bickering with the mossy dumbass. Maybe he would ask Cami to let him take that patient off her hands entirely.

Maybe he would cook him something a little special tomorrow He had said he hated the food here and Sanji knew how to cook… Naturally he would tell the guy that he'd put plant fertilizer in it just to fuck with him.


	2. That Feeling

_A soothing mini-fic. Nakamaship with a dash of ZoSan. Rated K+_

* * *

Sanji frowned in concentration as he leaned in close. The cook's ever-present cigarette was temporarily abandoned in an ashtray with a wispy line of smoke spiraling up from the still-lit cherry. Zoro could smell the smoke on Sanji's breath as the cook's soft exhales brushed warmly against Zoro's face. Sitting perfectly still and tense, Zoro's gaze remained locked on Sanji's brilliantly blue eyes as the cook looked him over. Sanji's frown deepened in apparent dissatisfaction, and his long, graceful fingers gripped Zoro's jaw and pulled his head slightly to the left. Zoro couldn't help but notice the warmth of Sanji's hand as it cupped his chin. Some people, like Robin, had hands that were cool to the touch, but Sanji's warmth was soothing against the skin of his face. Feeling cold metal slide against the back of his left ear, Zoro continued to watch Sanji in his peripheral vision. It wasn't that he felt threatened - even with the temperamental blonde handling something so sharp this close to his face - it was just that Zoro wasn't often able to really _look_ at Sanji. It was like seeing someone entirely new to him. Zoro curiously stared at the different hues of gold in Sanji's hair, the light wrinkles on his pale complexion, the shape of his mouth as he frowned, and those damn fascinating blue eyes.

Sanji poked his tongue out slightly from between his lips, immediately drawing Zoro's attention. The metallic rasp and click of the scissors sounded louder this close to his ear. Sanji leaned away and tilted his head to observe the effect of his work, silky blonde hair briefly flowing away to fully reveal both blue eyes. Zoro held very still as he watched Sanji's gaze travel over his face and hair. The cook stepped back to Zoro's side and continued around to the backside of the chair where the swordsman was seated.

"Almost done, marimo."

Zoro felt Sanji's fingers run through his hair on the back of his head and neck. The light rubbing and scratching felt really good. Zoro's eyelids fluttered and drooped without his permission. "Don't fall asleep again you idiot."

"M'not."

"Whatever, you lazy moss-ball."

There was another click of the scissors before Zoro heard Sanji step away again. "Not bad, even if I'm not a barber. I guess that should do it."

After one last cut, Sanji reached over Zoro's shoulder and untucked the sheet from his collar. Zoro watched the little clusters of green hairs slide to the floor off the sheet. "We're done?"

"Yeah." Sanji set the scissors on the table and brushed a few hairs from the nape of Zoro's neck with the back of his hand.

"It looks good Zoro! Sanji! Do me next!" Luffy leaned close and playfully ruffled Zoro's newly trimmed hair causing more loose cuttings to fall onto Zoro's skin.

"Sure, Luffy, but you have to sit still the entire time."

Zoro carefully brushed the trimmings off his neck and shoulders as he stood. He'd better rinse to get all these little hairs off before they itched. He glanced back when he reached the galley door to watch Sanji tie the sheet in a double knot around Luffy's neck while the childish captain laughed and wiggled. The cook was poking his tongue out again.

Zoro grinned and strolled out on deck. That hadn't been bad at all. He would have to keep it a secret, but Zoro would love it if Sanji would use those warm hands to scratch his head the next time he took a nap. Those fingers had felt so nice - but that was an extremely embarrassing to desire to admit even to himself. He would just have to wait for his next haircut.

Maybe it would grow faster if he ate more meat or something?

He would go find Chopper after his rinse. The little doctor would probably know something like that. Zoro absently scratched his scalp as he wandered into the ship's bathroom. It just didn't feel the same when he did it himself. It had to be Sanji.


	3. At Your Convenience Short 1

_AU Short set in the "At Your Convenience" Universe. Rated 'M' for language and Zoro's bad attitude._

3.

* * *

Today Zoro's shift had begun with Nami's screeching about shitty customer complaints. That sort of thing was _not_ his fault and had _nothing_ to do with his facial expressions! Still Nami had chewed him out pretty good so he was already in a foul mood.

He really didn't feel like putting up with people's normal shit today. He kept his sentences short and practically threw the cash into the register while shoving purchases at the customers. He hoped Nami got an infected paper cut from sorting and counting all this money later.

Most customers got the hint and got the fuck out of his face, but there was always at least one stupid fucker…

Zoro's left eyebrow twitched in irritation as he stared at the pack of condoms. The customer who'd thrown them there was casually shopping for gum like Zoro had nothing better to do than wait for his slow ass. Why the fuck was an ugly old geezer buying condoms anyway…?

Wait. No, he really didn't want to think about that.

Zoro stubbornly stared out the window and distracted himself by counting all the junkers driving by - there went one now… "Excuse me?"

Turning an irritated scowl on the customer, Zoro decided he didn't like the tone of this asshole's voice. Who did this fucker think he was, making it sound like _Zoro_ was the one holding up progress!

"Anything else?" Zoro practically hissed the words from between his teeth.

The customer's beady little, close-set eyes narrowed in his saggy face. "No."

"Eleven and eighty-one."

Zoro rolled his eyes in exasperation as the old guy pulled out his wallet and counted out the one dollar bills individually. THEN he dug around in his pocket, excavating a handful of change, lint, and bolts. By this time there was already another customer waiting in line and obviously unhappy about the wait. Zoro tapped his fingers on the register while he waited for the dumbass old man to hand over the change for his shitty condoms. Ignoring Zoro's outstretched palm, the customer plunked the change down on the counter. Zoro gritted his teeth and scooped the money into his hand. "Have a nice day."

Zoro dumped the change carelessly into his register before wondering why the old guy was still standing there. Whatever. He decided to move things along and addressed the customer who was waiting, "You buying anything else?"

"I want a bag."

Zoro glared at the previous shitty customer who would _just not leave_! "Sure." He slapped the plastic bag on the counter before reaching for the next customer's bag of chips.

"_You_ bag it."

Zoro froze in disbelief. Was this fucker serious? He asked for a _bag _for his damn condoms and some gum and now he was too lazy to throw them in the damn bag himself? Zoro narrowed his eyes at the sneer on the old man's face. No this fucker was trying to make some shitty point here. Well too bad because there was no way Zoro would be playing that game!

He leaned slightly across the counter and smiled his warmest smile. A startled look crossed the annoying fucker's face and Zoro silently enjoyed a dark chuckle. "I'm sorry. We're not allowed to bag non-consumable items with consumables. Unless you are requesting accommodation for a disability?" The customer's face was starting to turn red with anger, but Zoro wasn't satisfied yet. "If your arm is broken, or you have a _serious_ disability, I would be _happy_ to disregard normal policy and bag your CONDOMS."

Zoro openly smirked as the furious customer grabbed his bag and shameful purchase before stomping from the store. Zoro's smirk grew into a grin when he watched the shitty old man throw the doors open so hard they hit the brochure rack in the foyer with a bang. Nami leaned out of the office and pinned Zoro with a deadly glare. "What the hell was that?"

Zoro shrugged and smiled, "Just some brat."

Nami gave him a suspicious look before ducking back into the office.

Zoro took the chips from the next customer. He completely ignored the wide-eyed stared he was receiving from the chip-man. Sometimes a shitty customer was just what he needed. Zoro broke into a dark grin as he finished the transaction in a good mood. "Have a nice day!"

The customer took his chips and fled the store.


End file.
